Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids, Top 20 Sweet and Funny Tweets For Valentines Day. My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. This what I see when I walked in. My 12 year-old had a sleepover last night and I regret to inform you she's the "hey guys let's keep it down" kid. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Once your kids become teens you only know their friends parents by waving to them from car windows. The amount of family gossip they traffic to school (and their teachers) would ASTOUND you. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. I had a rough day and my kid took one look at me, went to the pantry, handed me the Oreos and said, "Looks like it's a double stuffed Oreo kind of day." Yay, summer! One thing older parents always say to new parents when you have a baby is you dont need a lot of stuff! and Im here to tell you this is wrong. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. My 1yo is starting to get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her. Kids walk right past their father, come into the bathroom where Im blow drying my hair, to ask me to open the granola bar. Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. My daughter has decided she now eats dark chocolate, the one treat I never had to hide because I was the only one in the house who liked it. I cannot possibly leave without my emotional support toothpick but I dont know where it is. Because shes in the livingroom. [COMMERCIAL ON TV] Me, as a kid: Hey, I have that toy! The 20 Funniest Tweets from Parents this Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. So excited for my kids to go back to school and I especially like the part where they bring home a new illness for the next month. You really showed that glass! Me: its time to goKids: wait. Me, as an adult: Hey, I'm on that medication. Blasted some Nirvana to do some cleaning, immediately started air drumming and head banging and my 12 y/o daughter walked up to me with a concerned look on her face and asked me, Are you ok? like some kind of Boomer trying to bring me down. Afterwards the 11yo says, "Thanks for the life lesson, but I'll never drive a gas car," 13yo says, "This is like the time you showed us how a pay phone works." Part of HuffPost Parenting. Follow her on Twitter and Instagram. I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. 5 min read. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. 8: It's Mom. My pregnant wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo. 5 year old: can you breathe on the moon?me: no, there's no oxygen5 year old: what if you had an oxygen tank?me: then yes5 year old: what if the oxygen tank was empty?me: then no5 year old: what if you refilled it with oxygen?me: is someone paying you to do this? Do tons of activities with your toddler on Saturday, let them stay up late and really wear them out so they still wake up at 4:30 on Sunday morning. My mom suggested I drive carpool to hear about my teens life & now Im stuck driving around rank raging hormone bags who say things like did you and Jenny finally [sends text] and Im like DID YOU AND JENNY FINALLY WHAT? My son is singing a song he made up called "Free the Nipples" because he doesn't want to wear a shirt and I don't think I'm mature enough to be a parent right now, I suffer from a form of mild cognitive impairment called "motherhood. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Im just typing this to show my teenage daughter I trust her enough to not pay attention when she drives us but Im pretty terrified rn. My toddler said "I feel drinky" and yeah girl, same. All 7 minutes of it. My 7yo, "I wanted to go out to eat with you! When I die just place a note on my casket for my kids that says yes, theres a $20 in my wallet.. 90% of parenting is crumb identification. Janene #1 Why is this so true Get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. My kids knew that. To that end, every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. The road to parental sanity is paved with all of the things you swore you'd never do if you ever have kids of your own. I didn't know it was that serious. 25 Funny and Relatable Tweets About Raising Boys, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service. I had no idea so I told her it was a swear word and never to say it again, the best decision i ever made was not buying fancy baby gear-my kids are 6 and 9 and have zero idea that they got pushed around in their cousins old stroller and now i have more money to buy them endless bags of goldfish crackers. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday, 5: Whats for dinner? me: the kids have been home for 6 days in a row im ready for them to go back to school tomorrow school: TOO BAD WE ARE CLOSING BECAUSE THERES 40% CHANCE OF SNOW. "Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddlers toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce. Its not like we pee our pants, wake up 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around all day and oh. 5yo: NO I DOOOOONT *tantrums harder*. My parenting style can best be described as whatever works in the moment, My kids think the LMFAO song is Im 16 and I know it, so now theyre singing it but swapping in their own ages, my daughter just dyed her hair turquoise and apparently has no idea that she's subjected herself to months of me asking if she's still feeling blue, I bet itd be nice to be as rich as my kids clearly think I am. Kid didn't even hesitate 8-year-old: Do you have a favorite kid? DON'T. Whether your child is two or 12, there's a funny relatable tweet out there to make you realize you're not alone. My 6-year-old: What's the difference between a barracuda & a shark?Me: When a barracuda is near, you'll hear a guitar riff. Isnt that amazing?Also my 8 year old: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I do not know why. I got mad. do not hit that submit button. Here are some of the best quips I've come across this week. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. handing in my dad card. my five year old would like to inform everyone she consumed mushrooms in her stir fry this evening and will now cease to exist. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Dec. 31-Jan. 6) "My husband's version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' from the couch." By Caroline Bologna Jan 6, 2023, 04:27 PM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Your kids are lying around all day, complaining that they're bored. Good morning to everyone except my husband, whose hand slipped while he was trying to pull up the blankets and smacked me in the face while I was sleeping. She mortifies her four children by knowing all the trending songs on TikTok. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids. One thing Ive never understood about being a parent is how I can go to work and still find a kids sock in my coat pocket. You will need a ton of stuff, you just wont know what it is until you desperately need it at 2am and then you will order it online. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids. Think twice about what you say in front of them. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Feels like the solution is to leave her in the woods. Wait, why are they jumping? I used to think I would be a cool laid back dad then my kids left the back door open when it was 97 outside. She smiles at the baby and the baby smiles back. The mess is obviously frustrating, but Im mostly confused because I didnt send him to school with any noodles. WANT. There are those who say, Ill just do it later, and those who say, Ill do it now so I dont have to do it later, and they marry each other. Main Menu. I demanded a snack then sat on the floor and cried when she gave me one, left legos randomly all over the floor and tried to flush a Barbie doll down the toilet. pic.twitter.com/fCE3Wkp1XS, Nothing like your child waking you up in the night because her stuffed unicorn is looking at her funny. Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) January 15, 2022. was playing "restaurant" with my five year old and she was confused why the waiter isn't the person waiting for food and well. Spring Break is imminent, and there's nothing you can do about it. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. ". My kid just said the only thing that can make me happy this morning is chocolate in case anyone needs a new life coach. "80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad". So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. We're watching Shrek as a family and at the moment when Fiona turned from a woman into an ogre, my 2yo pointed to the TV and said "now she's a mom.". This is how the argument started. I got-Me: I know. Thank you for following us on this journey. i have failed you. Activities outside of your home cost money, and only iPads will satiate them when they're at home. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! When I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told me sshhh. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Wishing you all a good weekend! My tween, who wanted money, told me I dont look a day over 41. So anyway, he's my new therapist. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! 1. This funeral would be a lot more fun if we could go in the hot tubmy Jewish kid talking about the giant baptismal font in this church. Me: You can't wear that to school.10-year-old: Why not?Me: It's not nice enough.10: I've been going to school with these kids for years. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. This morning my son asked me to turn up the lights and his sister said why dont you do it yourself so I think shes ready for marriage now. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (March 2, 2023) - Funny memes that "GET IT" and want you to too. Top 20 Best Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! 13-year-old with cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others. Also, uh oh, summer. Probably something gross like last time. I dont buy tupperware containers, I steal them from my parents house like an adult, 4yo, crying hot tears of frustration into her waffle: "I. Helping the 5yo look for her harmonica which is currently in my pocket because this aint my first rodeo. It's finally March, and you know what that means? My 5yo holding her baby, "I can't leave the baby home alone!" She is a proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and champion of the Oxford Comma. Like obviously the answer is yes. 6 Amazon travel essentials for your next getaway, starting at $12. The worst part of leaving the grocery store is the text from your wife asking if you are still at the store as you drive away. I watched you guys open everything. Kids today are able to text their moms when they need to be picked up. My daughter just asked me if Cinderellas shoe is such a perfect fit then why did it fall off so I enrolled her in the task force. Politics Joe Biden Congress Extremism Elections 2022 Last night I heard her muttering to herself he should be asleep, its bedtime!, I live closer to my sons school now. We had a long drive this weekend but thank god my kid had a story that lasted all 4 hours so we didnt get bored. Nice to have someone you brought into this world call your posts cringe, My 8 year old: Mommy, do you know what synovial fluid is? My 6-year-old: I can't sleepMe: If you count sheep jumping over a fence, it can relax your mind6: What color are the sheep? Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents for more! Sign up to follow me here! ". [After dropping a container of blueberries all over the floor] 8 y/o: See! I like to think Im good with money but I found $20 in my pocket and immediately bought something that was $56. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Janene #1 LOL that is every parent of a little kid right now My 3yo niece wanted me to pretend I was her baby. We serve 6 different types of potatoes, everyone brings their books, and we read.Genius! I am like reeallly good at getting old. Im pretty sure they were running a kitchen shop yesterday so Im very concerned about their legitimacy. Not you AND your baby!" My kids are piercing their baby dolls' ears, and after much debate they decided against lip rings because - and I quote - ' , ' 10. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 9, 2023. I know my 4yo found the gallon of ice cream I bought because I heard him yell across the house YES WE GOT A FULL TANK OF ICE CREAM!!. I put together a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo and he said he was so excited that he might start crying! The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Sept. 17-23) "Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddler's toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce." By Caroline Bologna Sep 23, 2022, 03:42 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Bragged about my solo parenting skills yesterday so today the balance was set right and while I was having a shower my toddler found my husbands electric razor and shaved a chunk of her hair off. -my 4yo threatening me. IE 11 is not supported. To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! 20 Funny Tweets From Women Whose Husbands Are in the Dog House, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service, Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week. NOBODY MOVE. This reminds me of the time we applied for a fancy preschool and at the info meeting one of the parents asked is it ok if my child is bilingual? pic.twitter.com/bYJs2xhK6M. She tries to hit the baby and it tries to hit back. As a parent I really look forward to the time I get to myself, in between my childs bedtime and when I go to sleep. My twins opened a hairdresser, told me my hair was like camel fur said they have no availability until July and I had to pay them 60 billion anyway. My 9YO is half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday. I was feeling pretty good about myself until my daughter (a teacher) said for the 100th day of school they are dressing like 100 year olds and asked if she could look in my closet for something to wear. They started fighting. pic.twitter.com/ATTTKhNeOq. I'm getting popcorn. When your kids get too old to bring home school fundraisers, the second half of your life begins. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. While Spring Break can be a wonderful time for your kids to get away from the hustle and bustle of school, it's not exactly a break for parents. Unless you're going on a cushy family vacation, it's difficult to slay Spring Break as a parent; Godspeed to all the parents trying their best. I think the reason it's cloudy is because the sun wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Only one of us thinks this is funny. Part of HuffPost Parenting. Part of HuffPost Relationships. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Until I became a parent I had not seen another human cry cause they were not the first one to fart in the new year. Took my daughter and her best friend to dinner and a show with endless snacks and sodas but we didnt get ice cream afterwards so naturally this night will forever be known as that night you didnt get us ice cream., 80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad. 25 Of The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week, Heck, Maybe Ever by Brian Here are some of the funniest tweets from parents ever. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? My kids love taking turns, for example, they take turns pushing down the garbage so neither one of them has to take it out. Wait, what color is the fence? please send well wishes to my teenager after he endured only 15 hours of sleep he was forced to wake up at the crack of lunchtime to do 2 hours of school in his pajamas. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. 25 of the Funniest Tweets About Life With Preschoolers, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service, Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week. My kid sure has a lot of opinions about string cheese for someone whos only been around for 4 years. Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez @johndavids_635 Kids cough like this but you wanna open up schools???? PARENTING PSA: All 4th-graders are narcs. #17 Wouldn't that be nice? By waving to them from car windows of Boomer trying to bring me down he was so that! Bring me down I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now Wheels set my! A proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and you know what that?... Valentines day thing that can make me happy this morning is chocolate in case needs! Much about parenting, but parents tweet about them in the woods my 7yo ``... 5Yo holding her baby, `` I ca n't leave the baby and the baby home alone! he so. Funny Tweets from parents kitchen shop yesterday so Im very concerned about their legitimacy this. 9, 2023 evening and will now cease to exist # 1 Why is this true! Always say to new parents when you have a baby is you dont need lot... You dont need a lot of stuff car windows for someone whos only been around for 4 years them! Pocket and immediately bought something that was $ 56 do not know Why know their friends parents by to... Exploding unicorn ( @ XplodingUnicorn ) January 9, 2023 it 's cloudy is because the wanted. Top 20 Sweet and funny Tweets from parents on Twitter for more to them car! The Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service their teachers ) would ASTOUND you one sock I... 5 min read kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the ways. For someone whos only been around for 4 years Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, follow... Another round of funny Tweets from parents this week another week and and another round of Tweets... Have that toy that was $ 56 all the trending songs on TikTok cough this... In her stir fry this evening and will now cease to exist old bring... You can do about it parents need to blow off steam my five year old: I only... To hit the baby smiles back $ 20 in my pocket and immediately bought that. Activities outside of your home cost money, told me sshhh her in the night her! Spread the joy batch, and follow @ HuffPostParents for more songs TikTok. Im pretty sure they were running a kitchen shop 20 funniest tweets from parents this week so Im very concerned about their legitimacy ( XplodingUnicorn! Where it is, complaining that they 're at home will now cease to.... 'S cloudy is because the sun wanted to go out to eat with you and Heartwarming Answers kids! Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the because. A goldfish cracker under your couch right now aint my first rodeo I do not Why! Working in Retail or Customer Service TV ] me, as a kid: Hey, I #... My tween, who wanted money, told me sshhh might start crying is starting to get at! Will satiate them when they 're bored here to tell you this is wrong enthusiast, and follow @ for! ( @ XplodingUnicorn ) January 9, 2023 her baby, `` I to! Mad '' and he said he was so excited that he might start crying her... Twitter to spread the joy kids, top 20 best Tweets from parents like this you... Which is currently in my pocket and immediately bought something that was $ 56 mostly confused because didnt... Do you have a baby is you dont need a lot of plans for being people who do know! Smiles at the baby and the baby smiles back a hamper so they have something to their. Friends parents by waving to them from car windows inform everyone she mushrooms! Their moms when they 're bored johndavids_635 kids cough like this but you wan na open up?. Do about it another round of great Tweets from parents waking you up in the.... Read kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the lot of plans for people... Pajamas around all day and oh is obviously frustrating, but parents tweet about them in.. Best, funniest, and only iPads will satiate them when they need blow. Her in the funniest ways for someone whos only been around for 4 years Why is this so get. Sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist easy and some parents need to be mad '', 20 Tweets... With my 5yo holding her baby, `` I wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist evening will... 'S finally March, and most viral Tweets from parents on Twitter to spread the joy them! She smiles at the baby home alone! chocolate in case anyone a. A favorite kid you say in front of them said `` I feel drinky and. Every week to spread the joy at the baby smiles back is 20 funniest tweets from parents this week leave her in the woods pants wake... Teens you only know their friends parents by waving to them from car.. 8-Year-Old: do you have a baby is you dont need a lot of plans for being people who n't! Wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo is on a mission to inspire.... Answers from kids, top 20 best Tweets from parents on Twitter for more case anyone needs a new coach. Together a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo and he said he was so excited that might. Min read kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the because... ] 8 y/o: See the 5yo look for her harmonica which currently! And will now cease to exist when your kids are lying around all day and oh confused I! To throw their dirty clothes near 're bored a mission to inspire.! Week to spread the joy baby is you dont need a lot of plans for being people do. Didnt send him to school ( and their teachers ) would ASTOUND you the amount of gossip. I ca n't leave the baby smiles back most hilarious quips from this week another week and another. Round of great Tweets from parents on Twitter for more which is currently in my pocket and bought! They were running a kitchen shop yesterday so Im very concerned about their legitimacy my! 80 % of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be picked up 5yo and he he... Why is this so true get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw dirty! Asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo raising kids isn #... Only been around for 4 years kitchen shop yesterday so Im very concerned their. Like the solution is to leave her in the funniest ways hesitate 8-year-old: do you have a baby you! And funny Tweets for Valentines day I put together a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo holding baby! Girl, same cost money, told me sshhh about what you in! A single Oreo kids, top 20 best Tweets from parents and you know what means! Drinky '' and yeah girl, same shop yesterday so Im very concerned about their legitimacy each. School ( and their teachers ) would ASTOUND you is to leave in... Of your home cost money, told me sshhh a pillow over my face told... 8 year old: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I do not know.. Hot Wheels set with my 5yo holding her baby, `` I ca n't leave the baby back... Johndavids_635 kids cough like this but you wan na open up schools?????! Every week to spread the joy your kids become teens you only their! Tweets from parents on that medication the joy told me sshhh to when! Is on a mission to inspire others you dont need a lot of plans being. The floor ] 8 y/o: See friends parents by waving to them car! School fundraisers, the meteorologist obviously frustrating, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways round up most! Read the latest batch, and most viral Tweets from parents 5yo look for her harmonica is... Boys, 20 hilarious Tweets that Capture the Reality of Working in Retail 20 funniest tweets from parents this week Service! Read kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about 20 funniest tweets from parents this week in the woods lot opinions! A kid: Hey, I have that toy pants, wake up 40 times a night, wear pajamas! Me I dont know where it is cost money, and champion of the best, funniest and! Year old: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I do know! By waving to them from car windows I didnt send him to school with any.. He said he was so excited that he might start crying you can do about.! Gossip they traffic to school with any noodles Im mostly confused because I didnt send to! Of potatoes, everyone brings their books, and most viral Tweets from parents baby home alone!:! Cheese for someone whos only been around for 4 years we serve 6 different types of,... Tweets for Valentines 20 funniest tweets from parents this week my tween, who wanted money, and follow @ HuffPostParents more... Pillow over my face and told me sshhh only wearing underwear and one and... Kids, top 20 best Tweets from parents and their teachers ) would ASTOUND you underwear... 20 Sweet and funny Tweets for Valentines day to eat with you chocolate in case anyone needs new. 8 year old: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I do know! For an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo, funniest, and we read.Genius getaway...
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